Confronting people isn’t so easy. A lot could go wrong. Trying to say the right words at the right
time can be a difficult task; especially if the critic is on the defense or
doesn’t believe he/she has done or said anything wrong. There is the expression, “like it or lump it.” Meaning,
one can deal with it or agonize through it.
President Harry S. Truman was credited for saying, “If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.” Meaning, if you can’t handle the task,
get out.
Jesus had to confront two of his disciples
during and after the Last Supper. The
first was Judas. He was a money-grubbing
kind of guy. His actions before the
supper demonstrated that he would do anything to get rich, even if it meant to
sell out a friendship with a man he knew was the Son of God. Judas was selfish. Like it or lump it kind of guy. A conniving fraud that made it look as if he
was really into the whole discipleship idea.
He was a liar. He was a pretender. He was a con man.
The second disciple Jesus had to confront was
Peter. It was after the supper when Jesus told his disciples, “This very night you will all fall away on
account of me….” Matthew 26:31
Peter became argumentative by saying, “Even
if all fall away on account of you, I never will.” Matthew
26:33 In the moment, Peter believed it.
He wanted to believe it. He was
determined to get Jesus to believe his ability to “stand the heat!” But, when
Peter is left alone and was tested in his true loyalty to Jesus, the Son of
God, he had to “get out of the kitchen.” Peter failed.
Peter cursed and swore that he didn’t even know Jesus. The once determined disciple has now become
the reality of Jesus’ prediction.
Confronting can be painful and exhausting. Jesus proves that confronting isn’t easy;
especially with people who will not listen or lie or think they know more than
Jesus does. Confronting is necessary and
will ultimately reveal the real truth. When
the truth is revealed, that too, can be painful, as it was for Jesus, but
again, it is necessary to get it out in the open.
Jesus’ model for
confronting was to simply put it all out in the open and deal with it
head-on. He never sugarcoated anything
for the sake of not offending the one being confronted. However, he was not rude, nor was he hateful. When he confronted Judas and Peter, he was
calm, gentle, and sensitive. He never
said hateful and demeaning comments, nor did he belittle anyone. Rather, he stated the facts and dealt with
the problems with an open and honest heart and attitude.
In order for our
homes, churches, communities and government to be a better place, we have to
learn to sit down and deal with our differences with an honest and open heart
and attitude. The bible is full of ways
to deal with difficult people and situations.
The key is applying them with a desire for a positive outcome. It is true, not all outcomes will be
positive, but at least the issues were dealt with and the motives were
right.
“Get
rid of ALL bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every
form of malice” Ephesians 4:31
If your brother or sister sins against you,
go and show him/her faults, just between the two of you….” Matthew 18:15a
Make
every effort to live in peace with all men….” Hebrews 12:14
“Be kind to each other,
tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven
you.” Ephesians 4:32
As we confront, ensure that the
heart is right, motive is right, and the desired outcome is right. We represent Jesus and to stray from his way
of confronting people will be disastrous.
Remember, Be God Controlled!